SO I LITERALLY HAD THE BEST HALLOWEEN EVER OF MY LIFE, and I want to share it with all of you slutty costumed Kunts. My Halloween officially began the day before Halloween on October 30th when I went to CVS and bought two packs of Reese’s, each pack containing six. For the trick-or-treaters myself of course. I was PMSING bad and ate 8 that night & the remaining four the next day, Halloween. My more stupid than stupid junk food binges were to stop November 1st, so until then this bitch was going in. The November 1st stop did not end up happening BTW as you will see but there is always November 2nd….
|| My Poison of Choice ||
|| Just two fashionable witches going on a bitch hunt, Getting rid of the evil & killing all the kunts. ||
|| Contact Barissa for Kunt removal services. Will kill for Chanel. ||
|| Fuck the broom, we took Riss’s hot whip to the Pilgrim Diner in Cedar Grove, NJ after Riss picked up her paycheck at twerk. ||
|| In case you didn’t know it, witches love waffle fries and chocolate chip pancakes more than Loubs. #FATWITCHDIET .||
|| Then we strutted off to Practical Magick in Pompton Lakes, NJ to stock up on our “witchcessities” including a ring that we decide we will wear on our middle finger on our left hand to get rid of negativity & I also bought a creativity candle which I am currently burning as I write this post in my beanbag on a lovely Friday night. Oh we also bought these magic potions that you wear. One called “Hot Love” and the other “Attractiveness” that are supposed to work magic and send some evil hot demon boys our way… We love evil hot demon boys so, so much. ||
|| Then riss absolutely needed a pair of Jeffrey Campbell boots because SHE JUST FUCKING DID OKAY/ Therefore, after we left Practical Magic we then went to Garden State Plaza for a quick booty call . ||
|| Sugar Skull Makeup. Easier than you think. Made an eyeshadow mask (left) threw on a bindi that I bought one summer in Santa Fe, NM. Right, I focused on flower and heart elements to my skull because I love those things . Used Sephora brand colored eyeliners to add some depth to the black lines. I Got in my creative zone and made art on my face. || Added random strokes of color to my hair with hair chalk from Urban Outfitters. ||
|| Also did Riss’s makeup, hers was not flowery like mine it was edgier. The design details and color schemes had to capture our personalities in order to truly be our sugar skull alter egos. ||
|| After a mirror selfie / solo dolo photoshoot sesh & poison cocktail hour, we were off to the cemetery of 46 Lounge. ||
|| “… Long as my WITCHES love me, I could give a fuck about no hater, long as my WITCHES love me…. ” ||
|| The next morning I was so. so. sooooo hungover. Fuck going to school that was NOT happening. But Halloween couldn’t end there, Me and Riss had a little more WITCHING to do. So we got in our whip & then got on a bus full of creatures & headed to the BIG POISON APPLE, New York City. ||
|| We could not even think of consuming more poison, so instead of going bar strutting we went food strutting instead. Our first stop was Beyond Sushi in Chelsea Market. It is vegan sushi and it is super yummy. Our rolls of choice were “La Fiesta (left) and “Spicy Mang” (right) ||
|| After sushi we strut around a little and ended up taking a witchin’ stroll on the High Line, which is a park full of m a g i c a l plants elevated in the air, looking over the West Side of the BIG POISON APPLE. We had to collect leaves to make some potions with and of course we had to decide where our next food spot would be. Tough Decision. But not really we are overly obsessed with the GUAC at Dos Caminos so off to get GUAC we would go. ||
|| “… This to all of my enemies that seeing me gettin’ GUAC right now…” We all know Big Sean meant to say “Guac” and not “Guap” because what the fuck is “Guap” anyways? Witches love Guac. Witches love Guac so much. ||
|| To put a cap on our day of food adventures we decided to visit chocolate hell, Max Brenner’s. ||
|| We obviously both ordered the same desserts, Banana Chocolate Peanut Butter Crepes. || No Fucking Words. || Even though my witch self has never been to heaven because demons for some fucking reason aren’t allowed in & I can’t get a fake angel ID anywhere, I imagine that this crepe is what heaven is like only in food form. ||
|| Rest in Peace Halloween of 2013. You were the perfect combination of Crazy, Fun & Fabulous and you will totally be missed. ||
Xo….. The Witches B & M
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